I knew this would happen, when we first found out we were pregnant with this baby. I knew that I would be expecting her days and weeks before she actually arrived, so hopeful that she would come just a little bit early into the world. I told myself that I wouldn’t be so eager this time, that I would remain patience and peaceful while I waited, and avoid the anxious waiting that so colours my memories of the days leading up to Bean’s birth.
And yet, here I am again – so eager, so hopeful. I think there is less anxiety in my heart this time (perhaps not moving two weeks after baby is due has something to do with that?), but I feel no less impatient, especially once most of my family left after Christmas. I guess it’s pretty natural to feel this way, and perhaps it would be best to just accept this impatience instead of feeling guilty about it. Baby will come soon enough, I tell myself – I can’t be pregnant forever!
I remind myself of our abundant blessings. My mum has been here, being amazing and helpful, cleaning our bathroom and doing our dishes and taking care of Bean and getting me endless cups of tea while I “panda” on the couch. Most of the photos are hers, from our daily walks and explores around the area. We’ve discovered several new trails and beaches, which is a great perk of Christopher being off before Baby arrives. The trail to Cable Bay was a favourite, with its dinosaur treasure hunt, and Bean walked by herself for nearly half of it on the way back! (And yes, that is indeed Christopher falling off a wet log into the Chase River – at least it’s in our backyard so he just had to run up the hill into our house to get warm and dry.) I’ve managed to do a few extra baby preparation tasks that I wasn’t sure I would have time for, such as stocking up freezer meals and sewing a few extra mattress pads for the bassinet. Oh, and playing many games of three-handed euchre, and the occasional game of Settlers. Life ticks on, cloth diapers to wash, dishes to clean, meals to make, toys to clean up…and Baby’s arrival inches ever closer, whenever it will be.